By Jeff Herring
If you want to be successful in business, or in anything you do in life, you need to know CPR.
No, not Cardio Pulmonary Resuscitation. We are not talking about practicing blowing air into the mouth of a dummy. (Keep your comments to yourself.)
Instead, I’m talking about being Consistent, Persistent, and Resistant. Let’s take a closer look at each of these critical factors for success in any endeavor, including life. Read More→
“Each day is a gift not a given right” That’s a quote I heard the other day and it got me thinking.
We live in a world where we take everything for granted and our lives are so wrapped up in the day to day details that I wonder do we ever really live? Do we take every day as the blessing it truly is?
We’ve all heard the quote “Stop and smell the roses” and while its important to appreciate and enjoy the little moments of life I think we need to go deeper than that. I believe we have not only the power but the responsibility to make sure that we live a life that provides meaning and fulfillment, provides service and charity to others, we need to live in such a way that every aspect of our life is filled with Wealth. Read More→
Growing up, I liked playing a lot of sports, especially hockey, soccer and football. But one sport I really hated to play was baseball. It wasn’t because I thought it was a boring sport (well, actually I do, but that’s besides the point). Instead, it was simply because I was terrible at it. No matter how many times I tried or how much I’d practice, I just wasn’t good at hitting that baseball. Naturally, I’d tell my gym teacher when we had to play baseball that it wasn’t my best sport, to which I’d invariably be told that this would be an opportunity to improve my game, to build on this weakness of mine. Read More→
To be emotionally free you can’t remain naïve about relationships. Some people are positive and mood elevating. Others can suck optimism and serenity right out of you. Vampires do more than drain your physical energy. The super-malignant ones can make you believe you’re an unworthy, unlovable wretch who doesn’t deserve better. The subtler species inflict damage by making smaller digs which can make you feel bad about yourself-for instance, “Dear, I see you’ve put on a few pounds” or “You’re overly sensitive!”
Suddenly they’ve thrown you emotionally off-center by prodding your areas of shaky self-worth. To protect your sensitivity, it’s important to name and combat these vampires. The concept struck such a collective chord in my second book that in my latest one I illustrate how it applies to protecting your emotions and not absorbing other people’s negativity. In it I discuss these vampires to watch for and ways to deal with them.
Signs that You’ve Encountered an Emotional Vampire Read More→
We’ve all got a smidgen of vampire in us, especially when we’re stressed. So, cut yourself a break. It’s admirable to admit, “I think I’m emotionally draining people. What can I do?” Can’t be free without such honesty. Then you can change. These are some common indications that you’re becoming a drainer.
People avoid you or glaze over during a conversation
You’re self-obsessed
You’re often negative
You gossip or bad-mouth people
You’re critical, controlling
You’re in an emotional black hole, but won’t get help–this strains relationships and won’t free you
The solution is always to own up to where you’re emotionally stuck and change the related behavior. For instance, one patient in computer graphics kept hammering his wife with a poor-me attitude about how he always got stuck with boring projects at work. Instead of trying to improve the situation, he just kvetched. She started dreading those conversations, diplomatically mentioned it to him. This motivated my patient to address the issue with his supervisor, which got him more stimulating assignments. Similarly, whenever I slip into vampire mode, I try to examine and alter my behavior or else discuss the particulars with a friend or a therapist so I can change. Don’t hesitate to seek assistance when you’re stumped. Also, review the types of emotional vampires listed below to make sure you’re not one of them or that you don’t have one in your life. Read More→
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