While swimming at the YMCA recently, I saw a young girl with skinny legs and platted hair teetering at the edge of the diving board. Behind her were several boys from her class anxious for their turn to jump toward the instructor, who treaded water just beyond the edge of the board.
The instructor slowly counted down, “3, 2, 1,” but she didn’t move. The small crowd encouraged her with calls of “Just jump!” and “You can do it!” She kept glancing at her mother hovering on the perimeter of the pool, cheering her on. After a few minutes, she was still at the edge and I went back to swimming.
By the time I returned to the end with the diving board, she was off the board and leaning against the wall. It was clear she hadn’t taken a turn. After the other students finished, the instructor called her back up. Despite the cheeriness of her pink cap and bright goggles, I could feel her terror. That girl’s not ready to jump, I thought to myself.
Again, she gripped the board with her toes, the instructor counted down from three several times and most of the onlookers repeated their words of encouragement. I headed toward the other end of the pool and as I completed my lap and turned around, I saw a young life guard come up behind her, lift her up and gently drop her in the water. He had no idea of the opportunity he’d stolen from her.
The “just do it” philosophy we value so highly in our society has an underbelly that we rarely acknowledge. Sometimes we’re just not ready. By “helping” her jump, the adults in charge deprived this girl of two enormous gifts – the peace that comes from acceptance of where you stand and the power unleashed from moving past a fear.
Several attempts and fifteen minutes of coaxing made it clear that this girl was not ready to jump. There was shame implied in her unreadiness. Disappointment felt by those watching. And perhaps, just maybe a bit of our enthusiasm really came from the place inside that regretted all of the times we didn’t get past our fears.
The truth is “success” is knowing yourself well enough to determine whether you’re ready to jump and then accepting where you are, knowing that when it’s time, no one will be able to keep you from jumping.
Ego loves a good game of hide-n-seek and Staci Backauskas loves nothing more than shining the light on its favorite hiding places and transforming chaos, confusion and doubt into joy, laughter and peace. Her new book Ego: A Primer has made it into the second round of the Next Top Spiritual Author competition. Read the sample chapter on Guilt and vote at http://www.stacib.com. Everyone who votes can receive “50 ego Tips and Reminders: How to Transform ego from an Enemy to an Ally.” Out your ego today!
Article Source: Is it Always Best to “Just Do It”?
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I feel like that little girl on the edge of the diving board. At moments I feel like I can do a high dive better than anyone, if I just tried. But then fear makes me doubt my ability to swim. Did anyone even offer her a floatie?
Maybe the Universe knew she didn’t need a floatie – that she would grow more and feel more empowered if she did it herself!