by Sara Blumenfeld…
I recently attended the funeral of an 18-year-old girl who was killed in a car accident. There were 1,200 people there. I’ve been to my share of funerals and I’ve never seen anything close to this. It got me thinking-why so many people at hers and only a fraction of that number at most?
The answer has to do with networking. She had developed a huge network-family, church friends, school friends, teachers, staff at her high school, friends in her ballet school. But lots of us have a big network, don’t we? Ah yes, but these people were there not because they knew her, but because they knew she loved them. Read that again-they were there because they knew she loved them. Person after person stood and told how she had shown love to them-a ready smile, a daily hug, a post it note left on a computer. They knew, without a doubt, that she cared about them and was glad to be part of their lives. So they came to celebrate hers.
How many will show up at your funeral? Take a hard look at the way you interact with the people in your network: your family, your friends, your business partners, your clients. How can you change your behavior so that your actions convey, without a doubt, that you value them? One easy way is by giving a genuine smile that shines through your eyes whenever you see them. Personally I love hugs, but if that’s not comfortable for you, then a firm handshake will do. What are you thinking when you smile and greet someone? Believe me, it shows through your eyes and your body language. If you are thinking positive thoughts about the other person, that will show, and if you are thinking negative thoughts, that will show too.
How do people know you love them? By your kindness. Kind deeds are great, but kind words are even more important. Speak to someone harshly one time and you may never be able to completely recover the feeling of love and trust. Oh come on, it can’t be that important. Really? How do you feel when someone speaks harshly to you? Do you guard your words in the future, or avoid that person if you can? It may be hard to respond with kindness all the time, but it is so important.
Another big signal that you love someone is how you listen to them. Focusing on their words and body language, hearing their whole message, conveys love and caring. Interrupting, criticizing, and doing most of the talking yourself conveys just the opposite. So does looking around the room to see who might be more interesting to talk to. In networking situations you often have many opportunities to either talk mostly about yourself, or ask the other person lots of questions and listen carefully to the answers. Which you choose will determine how many relationships you build, or how many people will leave their encounter with you feeling less than when they started talking with you.
So how many will show up at your funeral? It depends how many lives you deeply touch.
About the Author:
Sara Blumenfeld, the Nurturing Networker, educates home-based and small business owners and entrepreneurs how to maximize their connections, consistency, and cash. Want more tips on business networking? Grab our free report at http://www.businessnetworkingmistakes.com
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Good blog Sara,
We start and end on equal footing. We’re born the same, and when all is said and done we die the same, marked by a tombstone or a ceremony and it doesn’t matter if you’re a multi-millionaire or die in poverty, what will truly reamin is your legacy and what you’re remembered for.
The law of the harvest is very fitting…. you reap what you sew and there’s no place like a funeral to get a birds eye view of what you sewed. Out blogs today are very similar. Mine today was on second chances and illustrated the Charles Dickens classic Christmas Carol as the perfect scenario of how Scrooge got a different view of his past, present and what his future would turn out if he were to stay the same course of being meiserly and greedy.
So the question you ask Sara is perfect….. “How Many People Would Come Out To Your Funeral” is really determined by the legacy you leave behind which in turn is dominated by the number of people you have loved and the verious ways you have demonstrated that love in Action, not just in kept inside feelings.
If we were all to take the Scrooge perspective and imagine what the ghost of Christmas Future would tell us, perhaps many of us would also in turn run out into the street and dance with passion and glee, given the second chance we did not miss Christmas in real life, and that we could love and live life every day like it was Chrismtas! A life lived like that will always have a full church/funeral home for the final and last celebration of your life.
Hola,
Nombre de wisdomalacarte.net a GoogleReader!
Gracias
Ivan
Yes, that is true, I agree with you, but I am not sure if there are no other options.
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