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You can’t stand out when you look like everyone else.

You can’t inspire and challenge others when you are just as fearful as them to stand out and be noticed. To put yourself in a position where people disagree with you. To be criticized, abused, and disbelieved.

To make a difference, you first must be different…

Last Friday I spent the day being inspired at TEDx Greenville. If you have never had the chance to go to a TED event, then you are truly missing out on an amazing opportunity to be wowed.

In the space of eights hours, there was Vaguen talking about the “Power of Ignorance”, a trumpet choir, a banjo performance, a concert pianist, Marshall Chapman singing rock ‘n roll, and Loretta Holloway singing cabaret. There was a rocket scientist talking about social media and 21 year old student telling the story of traveling across country performing random acts of kindness. Ellen McGirt, from Fast Company, talked about “Showing Up” and Paul Anderegg demonstrated old-time clogging called “flatfooting”. Five dudes with Ph.D.’s talked about everything from hydrogen to climate change to the morality of capitalism. It was diverse and powerful.

And then there was Tradd Cotter, the wonderkind mushroom mountain scientist, and Tim March, the blue-haired performer whose act on broken glass was only bested by his inspiring words about us feeling like we “needed permission” to go do amazing things. To me, these two were the most inspiring of all the amazing presenters.

Curiously, they were also the most different, which got my thinking…

It’s being different that we look to as a success. Why?

Most of us have a hard time being different…

Standing tall on the trophy stage is pretty easy. But standing up in the rest of the world requires a lot of effort. You really have to be a mental ninja.

That probably explains why we all aren’t more successful.

And here’s an observation for you: It’s not entirely our fault for having this fear. Everything we were ever taught since the beginning of baby-dom was about “fitting in”.

• As we entered school, we we told to “get along with everyone” - even when we saw that bad people were taking advantage of those around us. As long as they didn’t mess with us, we were “cool”.
• When we went into public, we were told that is was embarrassing to “make a scene” - even though for us is seemed like we were standing up for something. We were expressing ourselves.
• At our first job interview, the HR team kept asking us if we were a “team player” - and then went on to explain our compensation that was based on individual achievement.

All these “fitting in” qualities produce high-quality mediocrity. A “Grade A”, absolutely-guaranteed batch of status quo.

But they don’t produce success - the deeply inspiring breakthroughs that we dream about.

Success is the opposite of being like everyone else.

The reality is that most of us don’t like ourselves in our current state. We wish we were less fearful, selfish, and more kind. We know it about ourselves and hope you don’t find out soon enough. So why would we like you who is trying so hard to be like me. We were hoping that you would be different - and inspire us.

It may be hard to dye your hair blue and jump around on glass. It may be hard to get laughed at all through school as you grow bucket after bucket of mushrooms in your parent’s garage.

But didn’t we know that success was hard in the first place?

Whether it’s changing your title on your business card from Receptionist to “Diva of First Impressions” or preparing a proposal to your client that is the exact opposite of what all your competitors have put together - you’ll find yourself conquering more when you put in the emotional investment to be different…

And several things to think about in your Success Quest:

1. Being different won’t kill you…
2. Being different will get you noticed…
3. Being different won’t have people outwardly lauding you… (at first)
4. Being different secretly makes people respect you…
5. Being different probably won’t get you the incremental job promotions…
6. Being different positions you best to be able to change the world…

It’s our obsessive compulsions that yield greatness, not our penchant for compromise.

It’s Thomas Edison trying one more time after the 983rd failed attempt to build a working light bulb. It’s Harland Sanders trying the 1,009th time to convince a restaurant to buy his famous chicken recipe. It’s Oprah Winfrey sharing hope for the sexually abused in spite of her own scars.

It’s about you deciding that being your same self or like anyone you know is no longer acceptable.

It’s about being different.

And us starting that today.

About the Author:
These days, Dan is partner in a private equity technology accelerator and a former technology CEO. He is an early-early-early adopter of game-changing technology. He blogs regularly on his motivational selling blog Edge of Explosion!. He is husband to a cute gal named Sara and father to two energetic boys. He’s just an ordinary dude who happens to have an outrageous vision. And he wants to change the world…

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http://EzineArticles.com/?Success-Starts-With-You-Being-Different&id=3917205

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Some years ago, I sat at this wedding and met a younger woman who had gone to two Ivy League schools and had a masters and a doctorate and had run marathons and traveled in countries like Cambodia and Vietnam. Not only that, but she was strikingly pretty, could belt out Hip Hop at the karaoke bar, had a disarming sense of humor and a sweet husband with buckets of money. Clearly, she’d gotten quite the package deal from the Big Cosmic Travel Agent in the sky. The encounter made me want to run home and win a Nobel Peace prize or at least clean up my basement. Where had my time gone? Why hadn’t I achieved more with my life?

“Let’s keep in touch,” she said breezily, as the evening ended. And I thought to myself that could get expensive for me, what with the therapy bills and all.

Comparison is such a nasty business. A complete stranger could stir up a hornet’s nest in me, just by being impertinently flawless and sitting next to me with good perfume. In the wisdom tradition of A Course in Miracles, it says, “Love makes no comparisons.” It says this, not because that’s a nice thing to do, but because comparison is impossible. We don’t know the journey someone else is on. We don’t know the journey we’re on. We don’t know the miracles that are right in front of us, when we choose to enter our current lives with no regrets and no holding back.

“I should have done more with my life by now,” is a comment I often hear from clients. They are filled with comparisons, regrets and wisps of dreams that tempt and sting them. They come home from work barren and restless. They have survived on autopilot and “survival” costs them peace of mind. They want sweeter days. They yearn for accomplishments that reverberate in their soul. But here’s the real secret. They don’t regret their past. They regret their present.

You only regret the past when you’re not in love with the moment before you. Change this moment, and you change how you feel about everything. You can’t be in the wrong life…if you’re in an enchanted moment.

Comparison will cost you enchantment. When I strain to see my neighbor’s garden, I’ve taken my eyes off my own. “My God, look at the size of those roses,” I despair, while my patch of land withers with neglect. Nothing grows without attention and love. Likewise, nothing remains the same when offered love and attention.

Want to live a life of no regrets, no matter what choices you’ve made in the past? Make these choices right now. Keep your eyes on your own roses and tend them with every thing you have. Plunge into accepting and blessing your own unique circumstances. Take a small step, a big step, a holy step in the direction that calls you right now. Trust that you are not alone and that you will have what you absolutely need. Diving into this moment with integrity answers everything. There is no past or future. There are no other choices. It doesn’t matter what anyone else has. You have this unbelievable moment.

About the Author:
Tama J. Kieves is an honors graduate of Harvard Law School who left her practice with a large corporate law firm to write and to embolden others to live their most fulfilling lives. She is the bestselling author of THIS TIME I DANCE! Creating the Work You Love and is a sought-after speaker and career coach who has helped thousands world-wide to discover and live their creative dreams. Visit her at http://www.ThisTimeIDance.com and sign up for free inspiration and support through her monthly e-newsletter. Download her Free Report on “Finding Your Calling Now.”

Copyright 2008-2009 Tama J. Kieves. All rights reserved.

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Rajesh Singh’s father was small time clerk and had huge family of 8 children. Rajesh Singh’s father died when rajesh was 16. Rajesh was very passionate about education and used to top his schools. But sudden demise of his father and having 3 sisters, 4 brothers and mother to support, he was forced by life to give up his studies.

Rajesh did everything under the sun with single goal. Feeding his brothers, sisters and making sure that they at least graduate. In those times getting sisters married was huge job with prevailing social evils like dowry.

Rajesh started doing odd job till he settled with a job in textile trading unit. His responsible attitude, his zeal to succeed and his honest character saw him making good fame in the market. Soon rajesh was soughted after employee by traders. After working for 5 years as employee, rajesh finally got financier who wanted to do business of textile trading. Rajesh formed a partnership firm and slowly his business started flourishing.

Having established in textile market, rajesh diversified into retail business of ready made clothes. This business too took off and slowly his brothers started being part of his ventures.

Rajesh still has passion for studies but his business didn’t give him time for pursing his aspirations. It is said that life throws you surprise when you least expect it. His acquaint was thinking of buying a school but had 20% amount short for that. School was primary school and management wanted to sell it off. Rajesh soon jumped into the opportunity and became one of trustees of the school.

His passion for education, his zeal for interacting with students saw some of good reforms in the school. He introduced some programs for interaction with parents, programs for improving concentration of students, interactive studying.

His school was one of first school to have computer in the city. Soon his school saw rise in number of students and they expanded. They also got permission to make it into higher secondary school from primary school.

Rajesh then bought another school and today his tally is 7 schools. Rajesh believes that good education is best service to country and mankind in general.

His other businesses are managed by his brothers while rajesh is into school venture, dedicated, passionate and even at age of 66, nothing is stopping rajesh from pursuing his dream.

Author Name: Sharad Goswami

Indian Sawaal is Blog Dedicated to bring into light all that is important for India. It would discuss indian politics, terrorism in india, war on terror, indo-pak ties, social issues, crime, demographic dividends.

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I know that you do too! If the thought of play does not excite you, I suspect it’s just because you are most likely disconnected from a part of yourself that craves laughter and joy.

Our desire to play is deep within us. My dogs remind me of this each night when, like clock work, they start their routine of grabbing each other by the collar, tugging on their stuffed bears and running around the house chasing after play.

Many of my weight clients lack recreation in their lives. They are running from obligation to obligation. Their family life and work leaves little time for active play, so I’m not surprised in the least when they call me after a binge. Their soul is crying for something more. However, food will never fill that deep desire to create, jump, laugh, and enjoy the simple pleasures in life.

I was saddened when I read that a recent UNICEF study showed that American children are the 2nd least happy children in the world. However, I’m not surprised. Look at who they have as role models. We’ve robbed them of recess time and we are showing that it’s more important to climb a ladder of success than stay on the ground and enjoy.

We have also stolen our own right to have play in our lives. You deserve down time. You deserve to act silly, laugh and be curious about your world. So, try some of the following techniques to give yourself the gift of play.

1 - Schedule Play Time

Just like kids have recess time (well, at least when they did), adults need to schedule play time into their schedule as well. When I am making my weekly calendar, play is at the top of my priority list.

If you currently have no play time in your life, then maybe you can start out with just thirty minutes a week, and then progress up to at least fifteen minutes a day, hopefully more.

2 - Host a game night

Remember when the adults in our life would break out a board game and that excitement that would arise within us. Board games are fun and a great way to connect with family and friends. My favorites are Monopoly and Taboo. What about yours?

3 - Drop the either/or attitude

Our puritanical roots has convinced us that we must work hard and play less, but I am a believer that our work can be our play. Our work in the world should be a reflection of who we are, and we are innately playful. So, even if you are in a job that you don’t necessarily enjoy, or even if you LOVE your job, find ways to add more play to your work environment.

Recently, one of my private clients confessed that she loved Zumba, a form of dance/exercise that is becoming quite popular these days, so I had her approach her boss to see if she would be willing to allow my client to organize a lunch time Zumba class, and voila, it worked. Now, my client looks forward to work because she figured out how to integrate play into her work life, not to mention that she’s lost twenty pounds.

4 - Pick a Sport

Sports are great! They get us outdoors, make us sweat, and they are loads of fun. I challenge you to choose a sport that sounds fun or that you have always wanted to try, and take a lesson, sign up for a class, or just go out and do it.

5 - Dance

My daughter and I both enjoy dancing, and I am one of those freaky moms who knows how to “pop it,” “grind it,” and all other kinds of “verbing its.” My daughter and I will throw on some Black Eyed Peas and just get busy, dancing, laughing, and often times, I end up in some kind of physical state that has me asking for help off the floor.

When I’m dancing, I feel so alive, so free, and so, so grateful for my body.

Try throwing on some music, and just let yourself really feel the music, and dance!

6 - Walk barefooted in the grass

I love having my clients do this exercise, especially my very sophisticated clients who HATE the thought of getting their feet dirty.

Take off your shoes and walk out in the early morning grass, and feel the blades between your toes. Feel the coolness on your feet. Feel what it feels like to connect with the earth. Sometimes this is the best catalyst to getting us back in touch with our playful selves.

7- Become a Stargazer

Do you remember studying the constellations in school? I found it to be so fascinating, trying to find the Little and Big Dipper.

Not too long ago, I realized that even though I would occasionally comment on the beautiful night sky, I had lost that wonder that I had as a kid, so I took a blanket, and I headed out to just stare at the sky with curiosity.

Make a date with yourself and the starry sky, and watch that curiosity reawaken in you.

8 - Go to a Park

Parks beg us to engage in the act of play.

When I step into a park, I feel as if I am stepping out of the real world for a while.

Plan a visit to the park. Take your dog, a frisbee or just a good book and enjoy detaching for a while.

Swing, skip, run or, if you’re brave, go head first down the slide.

9 - Bubbles

Bubbles equal play.

As kids, we loved bubbles, but when do lose that fascination? I am convinced that somewhere within us women is that same awe when we see a bubble floating through the air.

As my daughter has gotten older, our bubble supply has definitely declined, but we still use bubble baths, and occasionally, I will run across a party gift bag that has a bottle of mixture and the magic wand, and I will walk outside and with the same fascination as a five year old, I will witness how air and solution creates this magical thing that floats through the air, and then pops. Amazing!

10 - Turn off the world and Just Be

Sometimes the best play is disconnecting from all the chatter of the external world and tuning into the presence of our being. When you can do this, you begin to gain that child-like curiosity that will open up many modes of play, whether it’s studying the clouds in the sky and trying to name their shape or simply just walking through the woods and just noticing what’s around you.

You are never too old for play. In fact, the older we get, the more we need it.

When you learn to be more playful in your life, you will find that the world opens up like a big amusement park and invites you in, and there you will discover play like you have never known.

Tonya Leigh Williams is a coach, speaker, and writer. She is also the founder of Just B Living, a company dedicated to empowering women to create amazing lives and bodies without dieting, deprivation and drama. Her passion is helping women find freedom from body image, weight, and food issues. She teaches the secrets of naturally slender people, coaches women on normal eating without deprivation, and shows women how to simultaneously transform their bodies while also living at peace within them. She has helped women lose weight, gain clarity and purpose, and step into a new life free of struggle. If you are interested in learning more about coaching with Tonya, please email tonya@justbliving.com.

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http://EzineArticles.com/?The-Power-of-Play-and-10-Ways-to-Start-Today&id=3897331

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5. Power of Decision

Our reality includes all our programs, memories, beliefs, attachments, emotions, and expectations. These have been gathered through many years. We have been blind and deaf for eons of time. We are completely drugged, looking for love, approval and appreciation in the wrong places and from the wrong people. We search for success, power and material things, thinking that they will “make” us happy. We tend to try to change people because we think if they change, we’ll be happy. We constantly give our power away by thinking that our happiness depends on other people and external circumstances.

Stop the world, I want to get off! Don’t you sometimes feel like screaming that? Well, we are now in the middle of the song, so we need to dance until it comes to an end. We can change the dance and how it ends if we just let go. It is imperative to wake up and see things as they really are. We must stop letting our false reality control us. I know it is terrifying to let go of everything we thought was real. Our fear is inevitable, when we let go of the known and embrace the unknown.

The beautiful thing about the process we learn through Ho’oponopono, is that everything you are looking for, what your soul is longing for, resides in this unknown. Sure, you will feel fear when it comes to letting go of reality as you know it, but you must do it anyway. Know this, if you are willing to ask for help, the help will be right there for you. All you need to do is ask, because you have free choice. The Universe cannot intervene if you do not request it. When you practice Ho’oponopono, essentially what you are doing is asking for help. You take 100% responsibility for your reality and give God permission to take you by the hand, guide you and protect you. You are not alone. Ask and you shall receive.

Be willing to observe the fear, knowing that you are not that fear. You are above it. By doing this, the fear will immediately melt and disappear. As soon as fear goes, in will come inspiration and guide you back to paradise, even if just for one split second! And when the next memory of doubt or fear appears, just keep letting go, moment by moment. When fear shows up, do me a favor: Breathe. The first thing we do when fear comes up is to stop breathing, so just this small step will go a long way in helping you to let go of your fears.

Think about it, you have the possibility of seeing the universe as God sees it, without fear. It is like seeing for the first time, like a newborn. It is another chance to start over. The happiness you are seeking is behind every “thank you” and “I love you.” Keep saying this to your fear, doubt, opinions and judgments before you let them go. Be grateful for fear, as it shows up to give you another chance to let go. It is a good alarm clock, telling you it is time to wake up, to do something differently, or maybe it is time to move, to take action. Fear is something we create in our minds, and our belief in it gives it power. As soon as we become aware of this truth, fear simply melts away.

You’ll find more about practicing Ho’oponopono to improve your life at http://www.hooponoponoway.com Be sure to leave a comment on the blog. And while you’re there, you’ll want to sign up for my newsletter. You’ll get the “money” chapter from my book, “The Easiest Way,” too.

Mabel Katz,
Empowering you to live the life of your dreams with Ho’oponopono
http://www.mabelkatz.com

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http://EzineArticles.com/?Letting-Go-of-Fear&id=3634158

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I – The need to create

Creation is a fundamental need for all human beings. Whether through the arts (painting, writing, music), work or even cooking, humans are driven to create and express themselves in one way or another. This need has inhabited our species since the dawn of mankind. You need look no further than our Neanderthal ancestors, and the prehistoric cave drawings they left behind, to be convinced of this fact.

This text is a first in a series of texts in which I will address this ever-present need within us, and its effects on our psyche. I will discuss artistic expression as a means of transformation, namely art as therapy.

I am not referring to art therapy merely in the sense of a therapist using drawings to analyze and understand the inner psyche of a client. I would especially like to explore the use of art as a therapeutic and transformative tool. Because all creative activities can fulfil our innate need to create and express ourselves, they can be defined as “therapeutic” since they provide well-being through self-expression.

This article will also address the conscious use of intuitive drawing as a means of self-knowledge and self-transformation. Drawing is featured here mainly because it is the most accessible and easy medium to adopt. Also, expressing ourselves through drawing has greater power than words, as conveyed in the expression “a picture is worth a thousand words.”

We can express ourselves on two levels through drawing. The first is the conscious level, when we know what we want to communicate. For example, I want to illustrate my holiday by the sea. As I am consciously aware that I am drawing images from my holiday, I would likely draw a beach, an umbrella, a beach chair etc. I would in fact draw all the elements that represent my holiday.

In most cases, people remain solely on this level. Their drawings are interpreted in terms of “artistic quality” or “drawing ability”, on whether they successfully illustrated their objective. This is where people inhibit their desire to create, with thoughts such as: “I would like to draw or paint but don’t have enough talent” or “if only I were able to paint.” The simple joy of creating can help overcome this mental block.

The second level is the subconscious. Anything expressed on this level is done so unwittingly; revealing what the drawer cannot consciously reveal. The self would be expressed in this level instead of a one-dimensional illustration of a seaside holiday. Here there is a deeper exploration of the self, depicted in the shapes, colours and tone within the drawing. Drawing ability is not the issue. On this level, a therapist can interpret the drawing and discover paths to explore with the client in therapy.

When drawing at home for personal enjoyment, we do so on the conscious level, therefore the unconscious meaning of the drawing is not readily evident. However, it is possible to uncover a few secrets using simple techniques that will help an observer “read” what ordinary eyes can’t see. I will explain these techniques further in coming articles.

There is also a third level of expression through drawing: the relationship between drawing and artist. It is a type of “retrofeedback”, an effect that the drawing has on the artist and the artist’s reaction to that effect. The resulting state of mind provides intimate information about the artist that is accessible if one is paying close attention. This is when drawing can become a powerful transformative tool.

In future texts, I will address topics such as: what inhibits our desire to create, accessing the subconscious through our creations, using drawing to create change and how drawing is a therapeutic exercise.

Clément Boily
clementboily@videotron.ca
Life Coach
Creativity Coach

(Note from Arlene Taveroff: The drawing you see at the top of this article was done by me during one of Clément’s creativity courses! It hadn’t drawn at all (much less in front of others!) since I was a child. This course felt safe, comfortable and fun. Most of all, I discovered so much about myself!)

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Leona MacDougall has been singing and writing poetry as a child to present day. She submitted this poem to us about “A Willow Tree” that tells so much about how we would all love to be each day as people, both in our relationship to ourself and to others! Thanks for submitting this to us, Leona.

 I wish i wish with all my might

to be a willow tree on a stormy night

bending without judgement at natures will

while at the roots I’d be strong and still

if other trees are afraid or forlorn

I’d lovingly assure them through every storm

what’s gone is meant to be

we choose the storms that set us free

releasing the past so we can look ahead

better uncertain alive than certainly dead

when I grow up I know what I’ll be

a fabulously flexible willow tree

i wish i wish with all my might

to be a willow tree on a stormy night

Leona MacDougall has been creating in the world of self expression her entire life. Singing and
writing poetry as a child to present day, Leona’s creativity continues to manifest through many forms.She is mother, wife, painter, spoken word artist and singer/ songwriter. Twenty seven years in the Beauty Industry, as a past Redken NYC performing artist, and hairstylist, Leona embraces “art” as a conduit for essence. Her passion for inviting others to make conscious contact with divinity has paved her way to NLP and various energy certifications through the WEL-Systems Institute in Ottawa. As an intuitive arts guide Leona feels honored to be present, in energy program experiences, for souls willing to imagine more.Contact Leona atleona_macdougall@hotmail.com

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I could fill a book with the copious amounts of embarrassing situations I’ve somehow managed to find myself in over the years. Everything from falling in to the nastiest of rivers in Toronto at my 13th birthday party in front of my childhood crush, to dangling from the side of a boat by my bikini as my whole family watched on laughing at me and taking pictures.

Believe me, I’ve been there, done that and unfortunately have the pictures to prove it.

These moments used to haunt me, something embarrassing would happen to me and my face would turn as red as a big ol’ tomato and I would try to find the nearest exit to do the inevitable walk of shame. I used to sit at night sometimes and wonder why everything seemed to happen to me and not to any of the popular, beautiful girls at school. They never got embarrassed it seemed.

It wasn’t until I was in my late teens, working at a hotel where things changed for me. I took a year off in between high school and university because like many people my age I had absolutely no idea what I wanted to do and I didn’t want to waste $5,000 on a university tuition when I wasn’t sure what I wanted to take in the first place. (Which by the way I ended up doing the next year at university nevertheless.) So, I ended up taking a job I thought I would despise as a house keeper at a local ski resort. Yes, I was the girl who knocked on your door and politely asked…

“Housekeeping?”

I tried to stay under the radar at my new job, avoiding the other employees. All of them were oblivious to me except for one girl. She kept at me, telling me stories of her weekend, boyfriend and how she loved snowboarding, something I was interested in as well. She was the type of warm personality where people were immediately drawn to her, and soon enough I found myself looking forward to our coffee breaks and snowboarding after work.

I thought she had it all together; she seemed like the type of girl who did anyway. The more I hung out with her, the more I realized that this girl, who seemed to have it all together, was in fact just like me, except for one major difference. She laughed at herself.

One night after work we were snowboarding and she took a major wipe out resulting in a mouth full of snow. Instead of panicking she jumped right up laughing hysterically at how ridiculous she must have looked. As time wore on, her bubbly personality began to wear off on me and soon enough I had a mini-breakthrough. I was walking outside a very busy mall when I unfortunately slipped on some ice and ended up flat on my butt. I lay there for a second or two staring up at the sky in pain, but I eventually managed to get up, brushed off my butt and started to giggle. And you know what? It felt pretty good.

I’m not saying that I no longer find myself in embarrassing situations; I’ve just learned how to handle them differently which consequently resulted in better self esteem. Just a few months ago I walked out of a bathroom unaware of the fact that my skirt was tucked in to my underwear. But instead of making a bee-line for the door I calmly un-tucked it, gave a little sashay to the lookers on and continued on my way shaking my head and smiling.

About the Author:
Brianne is a 24 year old who is still trying to repair her relationship with her inner child. She still loves licking the bowl after making cookies, taking long naps and day dreaming. Her dying wish is for John Williams to do a score of music for a week of her life so she can walk around with her own personalized soundtrack playing in the background.

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